As if worry about my brother was not enough, a friend of mine that lives in the UK had a heart attack on October 17th. It was severe and his doctor was amazed that he lived through it. It left his left ventricle (which is the main one that pushes oxygen rich blood thru your body) so badly damaged that he is in chronic congestive heart failure.
To make matters worse, he has had two minor heart attacks this week alone. The electrical signals that keep the heart beating in a good rhythm have gotten screwed up for him but he is not a candidate for any corrective surgery or even an implant for the heartbeat. He has a severe case of COPD and wouldn't live through anesthetics. This was news to me. I had no idea he had COPD until we were talking on the phone tonight. I was in tears over his acceptance of the fact that there is nothing that can be done for him. When they put the stents in his heart on the 17th, the doctors had to apply the shock paddles to bring him out of the anesthetic and also to get his heart to beat.
He told me he had signed a DNR (do not resuscitate). He said he had been given 23 more years than the men in his squadron that died in Desert Storm. He said when he died, he would be able to fly once again with them and he was looking forward to that. He did not expect any miracles and only hoped to live long enough to marry his fiance in January. He also said he did not expect to live to his next birthday, which is in March.
He was NOT looking for sympathy. He was urging me to accept that he was not going to be around for much longer. I told him that you meet so few good people in your lifetime that you just don't want to see them die and not be there any more. I feel badly for his fiance who hopes he lives long enough for their marriage. She lives in California and will be taking leave from her job to go over to the UK in December. She does not want him to die alone and have to be notified by his doctors that he is gone. They know she is his fiance and they keep her informed as to his health.
But it does tell you that, as bad as you think your health may be, things could always be worse. It seems the Beast has COPD but a mild form of it. He will be using his ventilator twice a day from now on, I gather. Since he isn't smoking, it will probably not get any worse unless he happens to get pneumonia or some other severe respiratory problem. Knock on wood, at least he isn't in danger of losing his life due to other problems.
It's been nice weather here today. It got up to 55 degrees and is supposed to hit around 60 tomorrow. It's cold outside right now (35 degrees) and is supposed to go down to around freezing. The Beast bought some suet and put it out for the birds using our feeders (we have three of them now). He enjoys seeing them using them and has bought a big bag of seed for the birds plus more suet. He also has been tearing up the stale bread we have and throwing it out in the yard as an extra for them and because you feel less like you are wasting it if you just throw it in the garbage.
I am ready for bed again so I will post this now and just leave saying *I love you all*. Tell everyone you care about that you love them. It's really easier than you think. Try it! Keep warm and dry. ***Hugs***
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