The Worst Eight Days In My Life....

The day the Beast had to call 911 was not a surprise to me.  It was all I could do to get myself into the bathroom that night (it was 3am) and then it was only because I could grab door frames and scoot myself around.  I had been, unknown to me then, hemorrhaging blood like crazy.  I thought it was just the IBS-D and that was bad enough.  I had put towels underneath me to little good but I didn't know that at the time.

I couldn't get up from the john, too weak, so I dropped to the floor and half crawled, half pulled myself into the computer room.  No matter what I tried, I couldn't manage to get myself into the recliner so I just pulled a blanket off the top of the clothes basket and decided I would wait until the Beast got up and have him help me.  Well, he did but he was shocked.  First of all, by the time he got up (around 7am), the room and I had both started to smell.  He wanted to help me into the shower while he cleaned up a bit but I told him I couldn't stand long enough for that.  So, he said he would help me sit in the tub but I told him he would never be able to lift me out because I knew I was too weak to help him.  That's when he called 911 because he knew without a doubt that I was in deep trouble.

The paramedics could see I wasn't able to help so they *cocooned* me in blankets and carried me out to the gurney and put me in the ambulance.  They could see I was severely dehydrated, my bp was very high and I was running a fever.  They were finally able to get a needle into a vein so they could start me on some fluids.  When we got to the emergency room, the paramedics brought me straight into a room where a doctor and nurse were waiting for me.  The paramedics had already radioed in all the important information.  Now it was try to find out what was wrong and what was causing it.

Finding a vein on me became an ongoing problem partly due to the fact that my veins are tiny and then being so dehydrated.  They did, eventually, while I was under anesthesia for an endoscopic and colonoscopic exam, put in a port at the base of my neck so blood could be drawn easily.  And trust me, I think they took blood about every two hours or so.  

I was also put into a cloth diaper and that is how they were sure I was bleeding out.  I found out I almost died....more than once.  It turns out I had lost almost 5 pints of blood.  The Beast got into an argument with the doctor about giving me blood.....like I was a member of his church and I objected due to religious beliefs.  Not so.  I was awake and aware and was totally pissed that they turned to him and not to me.  I had never given him that authority.  He has always tried to force me to do things his way and it never worked but I sometimes had to take doctors to task for that.  I told the doctors that it was HIS religious belief and not mine.  I really think that he might have welcomed my dying.  That was very scary.  I decided that, when I am up to it, I will give my sister, Cee, a power of attorney or whatever is necessary, to ensure I do not run into this problem in the future.

I found out the Beast was trying to move me to a different hospital that was set up to administer blood substitutes but discovered he couldn't do it unless I agreed since I was awake and aware.  Also, I discovered that one of the doctors said they had made arrangements with another hospital to get some substitute but urged me to consent because of how close to dying I was with the severe blood loss.  So I signed and said that, if I trusted more in their testing procedures, I wouldn't have objected at all.  He put me straight on the fact that they do now test for HIV, Hep B, Hep C and several other things that I hadn't even considered.  He said they had been doing it for almost 30 years now.  My information was just *slightly* out of date....LOL.

When the endoscopic exam was done (and the other end, too), they found the site that was bleeding and cauterized it but I still have an active ulcer.  And it's painful.  I'm drinking antacid like crazy just to be able to sit and relax for a while.  I'm surprised at just how weak being on total bedrest can leave you besides the fact that I was without food or drink for six days (that includes the day before I went into the hospital).  I finally was put on a clear liquid diet and really loved the grape popsicles I got with almost every meal.  I did get to (finally) have ice chips.

The worst part of this all was the pooping in place and having to be cleaned up by aides and nurses (mostly aides).  At least they were all very sweet and I hated to keep bothering them but I had to since I was already experiencing *sore* spots on my butt.

When I was finally able to get a bedside commode, I was so grateful.  Sure, it was tough getting in and out of bed much of the time, but it was a hell of a lot better for my frame of mind.  When I was finally getting an inkling that I might actually be going home, I was ecstatic.  All I wanted was to get home, take a nice shower or bath and sleep in a comfortable bed or even my recliner.  

So, after 8 days in the hospital, the Beast came and got me and brought me home.  He took my prescriptions (yes, four new ones) but I was taken off three others....at least for now.  Now, all I want to do is continue to get some decent sleep and not be in pain all the time.  I keep getting nauseous but have managed not to vomit up any food.  It seems its mostly just from pain.

I have to go lay down now.  I missed you all.  Love you much.  ***Hugs***